It seems I have been overlooking the fact that my symptoms are, again, progressing in severity. I'm finding out, more and more, that denial plays a huge part in a progressive disorder.
The length of time it takes for the level 10+ pain in the morning to decrease, anywhere from 5 - 7, is taking much longer these days. I'm sleeping more hours than I'm awake, again. I have a feeling of complete exhaustion, most of the day. Sometimes I can fight the desire to sleep, but most days, I can't. The right-sided facial and leg numbness is back. I'm continuously awakened with sleep starts, all night long. This, in turn, wakes Mickey up and he has to be up at 4:45AM. If it's not sleep starts, all night, it's tremors in my hands, legs, and now, my head. I remember, not so long ago, I didn't have nighttime tremors at all and now they continuously interrupt my sleep.
The increase, or rather progression, of these symptoms has been happening now, for at least three weeks. I guess I have turned a blind eye until I can no longer deny the reality starring me in the face. It sucks, but at least I've already gotten use to the progression. Is denial an absolute bad thing? I'm not sure, but for this particular situation, it has been a blessing in disguise. Since I've just now accepted it and I've already been going about my daily living with the progression, it's too late now to fall into depression. Well, that's my rationale and I'm sticking to it.
I hope everyone is having a wonderful day!
P.S. I heard from Kira (through her blog) and she appears to be doing well after the pain pump surgery. I'm still waiting to hear back from Penny so please, everyone, pray all is well with her and her husband. Thank you all for the prayers and well wishes.
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